I am excited that you are going on the College trip. Enjoy, have fun, and absorb the moment.
While you balance the above, don't forget to complete the following assignments. Their due dates
are FEBRUARY 4/5.
Here are your tasks:
Assignment # 1
Assignment # 2
The essays below are SAT published essays. They have NOT been
edited; they are the original submissions.
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Read and analyze them
carefully. Notice Sentence relationship and the author’s use of FRIESS to go 50ft deep.
II
Complete the two-column
chart below
·
Identify
the different commentary remarks so that you can distinguish the Score 5 and 6
·
Complete
the Reflection portion at the bottom of the chart.
Essay Comparisons
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Score 5
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Whereas
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Score 6
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Cite the Essay Commentary
Refer to the bottom portion of each essay.
(Your contrasting details may be less or more than 4.)
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1.
2.
3.
4.
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1.
2.
3.
4
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Other Noticings – Refer to the FCAT Writing Rubric.
(Your contrasting details may be less or more than 4.)
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1.
2.
3.
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1.
2.
3.
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Assignment: Are people better at making observations, discoveries, and
decisions if they remain neutral and impartial? Support your position with
reasoning and examples taken from your reading, studies, experience, or
observations.
Score of 6
Objectivity by researchers has not, and probably never will be
attained. People will always have biases; some will be created by cultural
values and others by personal views. The search for objectivity lies in the
realm of philosophy along with the search for reality. Even though objectivity can never be reached, people are
better at making observations, discoveries, and decisions if they attempt to
set aside their biases.
As I have learned in my
Theory of Knowledge class, perception and thought are intimately connected.
While the same rays of light may enter two different peoples eyes, what they
see may be very different. The brain takes the input from the eyes and
processes it to form an image. That image is not the only thing the brain
produces; it also provides extra information based on generalizations and bias.
This unconscious addition of information changes the observation of an object.
By attempting to reduce the addition of extraneous information being added to
the observation, by being objective, a true observation of an object can be
more closely approximated.
Discoveries, especially
in the scientific realm can be doubly affected by a lack of objectivity. Since
scientific discoveries are based on observation, all of the problems associated
with observation apply as well to discoveries. Additional problems occur in the
analysis of data collected by a scientific experiment. In a recent experiment
in physics class, almost all of the students in my class analyzed the data
incorrectly. However, armed with the knowledge that zero percent error is never
possible, we were satisfied with the results. Our personal belief in the
validity of the method of analyzation we chose, and lack of objectivity, led to
our incorrect discovery in the field of energy. A lack of objectivity can
clearly be seen to be a problem in my last student council election as well.
The most popular person was chosen for president, not the objectively best candidate.
Since then, the president has done nothing for our school. If the people
involved had attempted to set aside their biases and pursue the goal of
objectivity, it is less likely that errors would have been made.
Bias will always be a part of human life. It
can, however, be limited in how much we let it affect us. The less we allow
bias to influence, the more objective we are, the less likely we are to come to
false opinions, discoveries, and bad decisions.
Commentary: Why this essay received a score of 6
This essay effectively
and insightfully develops the main
idea (Even though objectivity can never be reached, people are better at making
observations, discoveries, and decisions if they attempt to set aside their
biases) with clearly appropriate reasons and examples, demonstrating
outstanding critical thinking. Well organized and focused, the essay shows
clear coherence and smooth progression of ideas (While the same rays of light
may enter two different peoples eyes, what they see may be very different. ... This
unconscious addition of information changes the observation of an object). It also consistently displays skillful use
of language and meaningful variety in sentence structure (Objectivity by
researchers has not, and probably never will be attained. People will always
have biases; some will be created by cultural values and others by personal
views. The search for objectivity lies in the realm of philosophy ... ). This
outstanding essay exhibits clear and consistent mastery and earns a score of 6.
Score of 5
Objectivity may be an
excellant guiding focus when one is writing journalistically, or when one cares
for simple knowledge in general. Yet I believe that it is only when you truly
throw your heart into something and are able to see things from a larger
perspective than what your head can teach you are you really able to live.
If you throw your heart
into something, and believe in it with all you have in you, you may find
something you didn't know you were looking for. In the San Juan Islands, there
is a place I care deeply about and have for the past ten years. It was the most
beautiful piece of property I'd ever seen, grzed & wooded and placed neatly
on the edge of a mountain lake. But others didn't see it the same way and made
plans to turn my forest into a casino. However, I gathered friends who felt the
same and we stayed in the woods for over a week, protesting. The land was
saved. I afterwards discovered that there was an old man who lived there, who
would not have budged if it killed him. Had I been a mere objective observer, I
would have allowed the destruction of a beautiful forest & a peaceful old
man. I have a heart, though, and I can take aside. I can protect those things
that mean so much.
So tell me, what is the use of objectivity if it
turns you into a lifeless robot? There is so much more than that, so have a
heart & take it!
Commentary: Why this essay received a score of 5
This focused essay
demonstrates strong critical thinking in developing its point of view (When you
decide not to take aside, not to take a stand; you lose your identity as a
person and become a stainless steel labratory—cold and empty). The essay uses
reasoning and appropriate examples from the film The Medicine Man and from the
writer's own experience to support the idea that one needs "a larger
perspective than what your head can teach you." The essay demonstrates
coherence and progression of ideas through its series of distinctions: head vs.
heart, science vs. morality, objectivity vs. taking sides, destruction vs.
life. The essay also uses language effectively (So tell me, what is the use of
objectivity if it turns you into a lifeless robot? There is so much more than
that, so have a heart & take it!). To achieve a higher score, the essay
needs to insightfully explain the limitations of objectivity rather than just
announce them. This essay demonstrates reasonably consistent mastery and
receives a score of 5.
